I watch helplessly
I am being drawn into you
I am observing myself go to pieces
In your presence.
There is still a bit of something
Left in me
That responds to external stimuli.
You make me realize this.
This is not sensual nor Platonic
This is divine
I don’t speak to you
Words say little between us
I express myself through words
To fill the silences and
Because you like my voice.
I shall not mince words
You know I often find it difficult
To put my plight in words…
I am submerging
As though in a quicksand
Choking in your inattentive attention
A vulnerable fragment of iron
In the Magnetism of you.
Like you did not cast
A spell on me…
The conceit in your indifference
Projects only too well
How desperately you want me impressed.
I fish for hours
to catch that smile
That hopelessly tries to hide itself
In the corners of your lips.
I know you can gaze
An hour-long at my face
But, time trickles by
Your ears are tuned into my movements
Your eyes, mechanically, on the T.V.
(You can give all the actors
A run for their money)
Are you not becoming a victim
Of your own Sadism?
I am amused by this hide-and-seek
But personally, I don’t forget
To sit in the warmth of your seat
Or to collect the memories of your fragrances
Or to pick the scraps of papers
With your handwriting on them
Nor do I fail to notice
How much you yearn to turn back
And how much you fight that thought
When you’re about to leave my sight…
Note: Yeah..this is how I delude myself when someone is not paying me the least of attention..